Pat on the Back

I'm going to go ahead and give myself a pat on the back. I find that I have changed so many of my patterns that it's nice, occasionally, to reflect on the new and improved way I handle some situations. I had a very disappointing encounter with someone last week that left me hurt, stunned and disappointed. I was happy that I immediately voiced my feelings but in a non-confrontational way but then it got even worse. So I cried for several days.

The old Wendy would not have gotten in touch with the hurt right away. She would have been ANGRY!! Not that I wasn't angry - I was - but I immediately was hurt as well. I appreciated a comment Rosie made yesterday - she talked of her rage towards someone and said, "If I were more brave I would have just cried." I TOTALLY relate to that! Crying and being vulnerable is the scariest reaction - it's SOOOO much easier to be angry and rage!

So I pat myself on the back for being vulnerable - not just vulnerable, but in front of Kurt and my mom!! My mom seldom sees me like that. And then on Saturday when I still felt bad, I asked Kurt to change his plans so he could spend the day with me so I wouldn't have to be alone. Again, the old Wendy would have tried to "tough it out" and then I would have eventually resented Kurt for not recognizing what I needed. (Our poor husbands!) But I told him I needed support and we had a really enjoyable day.

I will also give my mom and Kurt kudos for coming through and supporting me so nicely. Thank You!!