Setting up our kids

The other day Emily was too sick to go to a sleepover at Nana's house and as she was crying I found myself saying, "Daddy is bringing home your favorite dinner tonight & Nonie is bringing over Subway tomorrow for lunch." And she stopped crying and got in a good mood & I thought, "Uh Oh!" I'm repeating the pattern for her that I am trying to break in myself - using food for comfort. But is using food for comfort ALWAYS bad? I think it's ingrained to use it this way. Most of us have a food memory of a grandparent or a food memory of a favorite time with a parent. Or do we? Is it just me? Or just us with food issues, I should say.

For me food was used to comfort or more often create a good time. It was a treat for good behavior or a way to have fun as a family. We didn't go to the movies or do sports or play in the park as a family. I can't remember doing those things even once. Later in life, when I was older, I'd go to a concert with my mom and I can remember bowling as a family maybe 3 times. But the thing we used as a family was getting ice cream at night or lox and bagels on the weekend. Even when I broke both of my arms & my parents were driving me to the hospital, we stopped for ice cream first. Of course, it was during the Weight Watchers days so it was the gross low carb kind. But still, it struck me odd, even then, that we were eating ice cream before taking care of my broken arms and bloody body.

So maybe the trick is creating great memories with my kids of things not only food related. If some of the good times are around food but other good times are vacations or playing at the park or playing hot potato or putting on plays - if their memories are diverse - maybe then they won't use food as comfort when they grow older.