Don't Blame Me For Your Crazy!

Interesting revelation last night. A couple of years ago I was really hurt by someone but I reacted extremely strangely (even for me) and I never was able to put a finger on why I reacted to strongly. I felt hurt and anger come up so strongly that I just sobbed and sobbed for hours. I can't remember ever feeling that way. I just chalked it up to a mixture of emotions about what had happened but I really needed my space after that. Well, yesterday a similar thing happened and a similar emotion but not as strongly. But this time I was more aware of why it was coming up. It's still a combination but it's a mixture of "Why is it always about you?", "Why is any of my good knocked out by one mistaken act?", "Don't blame me for your crazy". I tried much of my life to get good attention - but for every 5 acts of good I would get a mild response but for bad I'd get over reaction bad response. I was in fear of the bad response since I can remember. And to this day, normal acts like a phone call can be met with "What? I'm busy!" - as if I could have known that before I called. And so I guess when I'm running across the "take, take, take, anger" or "take, take, take, blame you for my crazy" now-a-days it sets me off. What's interesting is that I don't respond to everyone getting angry with me - and I'm still working out what makes the difference. But it's nice to understand where these emotions come from.